Ask one of our career coaches what they believe to be the number one personal barrier to a successful return to work after a career break and the chances are they will say “lack of professional confidence”.

Women on a career break may be very self-assured when it comes to their home and social life, but the thought of returning to the workplace can bring on a crisis of professional confidence. One of the ways this lack of confidence is often expressed is in negative thoughts around the prospect of returning to work – “I’m too old”, “things have moved on in my industry”, “I’m not the same person as the one who did that managerial job” etc, etc. 

When we consider that much of our identity is tied up in our work, it’s not surprising that when we’ve been away from the workplace for any length of time, we can find our self-belief gets eroded. If you’re feeling under-confident, don’t let this hold you back – take steps to give yourself a boost and you’ll be setting yourself up for success.

Top Tips for Boosting Your Confidence

• Remind yourself of your achievements – Think about all you have achieved, year by year, both before and during your career break. It doesn’t matter how long ago it was, or whether it was a big or a small achievement, so long as it feels satisfying to you. To help, look out old copies of your CV to remind yourself what you achieved in past roles. Bringing your successes back to the front of your mind can give your confidence a real boost.

• Identify your key strengths and skills – Rather than focus on what you lack, focus on what you can personally bring to an employer. It can be a hard exercise to list your own strengths, so get feedback from your friends and family, and think about what skills you demonstrated in the achievements you listed. Don’t minimise what you’ve done during your career break – for examples, caring and volunteer work create valuable new skills. Read our blog on setting your career compass for other advice. 
• Adopt the right mindset – Your attitude has a powerful impact on your likelihood of success. We find that returners who work on their patience, persistence and positivity are more likely to make a successful return than those who give in to frustration and negativity. We discuss how to adopt a mindset of ‘realistic optimism’ in this blog and a growth mindset, in this blog.
• Brush up your knowledge and skills – Don’t let feeling that your IT skills or industry knowledge are out of date sap your confidence. Upskill yourself. Find courses locally and look at the free online MOOCs (Massive Online Courses) to help bring yourself back up to speed. Use industry events and professional associations to find out what’s been happening in your field and meet ex-colleagues to get an informal update.
• Update your image – If you look professional, you’re more likely to feel like a professional again. If you can afford it, it’s worth investing in a new outfit (and maybe a new haircut) for networking and interviews. Read our step-by-step advice on updating your wardrobe for your return. Establishing a regular exercise routine can also make you feel and look better, as well as boosting your energy levels.
• Volunteer – If you’ve had a very long break, strategic volunteering can be a good way to ease you back into your ‘professional self’ and to refresh your skills and experience at the same time.
• Body Language – Focusing on looking more confident through the way you walk and talk can actually make you feel more confident. Read more here.

And don’t forget to take a look at the Success Story Library on our website – reading the wealth of stories of a wide range of women who have successfully returned to work after multi-year breaks can help you to believe that you can do it too!

Self-confidence – if only we could create and bottle it we would make our fortune! The reality is that many women who have taken a career break suffer from a lack of professional confidence. And it’s really not surprising – it’s natural for confidence to fade when we take a long break from an activity that formed a large part of our identity.

The good news is that your professional confidence quickly comes back after a successful return to work. However if you’re struggling with your self-confidence at the moment, take heart from the fact that neuroscience and psychology show that our actions can change our thought patterns to build self-belief. So ‘faking it until you make it’ can often lead to a real increase in confidence.

Top tips for appearing more confident than you really are

Appearance

• Dress in a way that makes you feel good about yourself (read What to Wear to Interviews).

Body language

Anna, one of our Women Returners coaching team, suggests ideas and exercises to build your return-to-work confidence and courage.

You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face Eleanor Roosevelt

‘I want to put myself out there and network but I’m not sure people will want to meet me’
‘I want to go for that job but I don’t think they’ll be interested in me’
‘I want to go for interviews without worrying about sounding stupid and out-of-touch’

Confidence to Courage

• Reframe fear as simply what happens when you are pushing your boundaries. I watched my 5 year old son stand on the steps of the swimming pool paralysed with fear. Yet he splashed in and took the first steps towards swimming. To become a better swimmer he will keep feeling fear but it’s a sign he’s trying something new, not of weakness.
• Think about a time when you have been courageous. How did you nourish your courage and starve your fear? Taking a moment to think about your strengths and achievements can help in building feelings of courage.
• Fear tends to grow if you don’t address it. Let’s say your fear relates to getting your opinions heard. On your return to work, you’re sitting in a meeting, time is ticking by, you haven’t said a word, and your throat is getting dry and your palms sweaty. Next time, get your voice in early. By doing something, anything, to move things forward you are demonstrating courage.
• Imagine an area of your life where you do feel courageous – maybe it’s experimenting with new recipes, running long distances, setting boundaries for your growing children (believe me, it takes courage!). Think about the preparation needed, the consistent planning, the bit-by-bit improvement. Courage at work is the same – preparation and practice are needed. There isn’t a quick fix for courage.
• Often, fear relates to others judging us – and in returning to work you’re likely to be hyper-sensitive to this. If someone does offer some critique, remember that they are commenting on your work and not you as a person. Often, we take ‘your views lack coherence’ to mean ‘you lack coherence’. Women, in particular, tend to internalise criticism ‘it’s my fault’ and externalise praise ‘it was good luck’. Try to separate one instance or piece of work from your overall view of yourself.

Posted by Anna Johnstone, Coach & Facilitator, Women Returners

I first learnt about the impostor syndrome when I was studying for my psychology masters. I remember feeling hugely relieved that it was normal to be asking myself “What are you doing here?” as I sat in the lecture hall and started working with clients. Although not naturally plagued with self-doubt, I had found that retraining and practicing in a new profession after a long career break made me question my abilities. I felt like a fraud when I introduced myself as a psychologist, and wondered if I would ever truly feel like a competent professional in this new field.

The Imposter Phenomenon

It was reassuring to find out that even highly successful people can feel like frauds, and that these feelings are so common that they have a name. The ‘imposter phenomenon’ was first identified in 1978 by two clinical psychologists, Pauline Clance & Suzanne Imes*. They interviewed 150 successful women who, despite their qualifications, achievements and professional recognition, still considered themselves to be impostors in their fields. Clance & Imes drew out three main aspects: a belief that others have an inflated view of your abilities, a fear that your true abilities will be found out, and a tendency to attribute your success to luck or extreme effort. Since then, there have been many follow-on studies supporting the findings of this research, with mixed-gender samples across a range of occupations finding that up to 70% of people have feelings of impostorism at some point. Unsurprisingly, researchers have found that these feelings are most common when people are making a move outside of their comfort zone, such as starting a new job or taking on new responsibilities. Although it’s not an area that’s been studied, it’s clear that returning to work after a career break is also a likely trigger for this irrational fear of incompetence, even if you’re returning to the job you did before.

A decade ago, the impostor syndrome was little known outside of psychology, so I’ve been happy to see that it’s now more broadly known & discussed. A recent article on the topic in the New York Times quoted Maya
Angelou, “I have written 11 books, but each time I think, ‘Uh oh, they’re going
to find out now. I’ve run a game on everybody, and they’re going to find me
out.’”

There is sometimes a misconception that this is another ‘women’s issue’ – lumped in with low self-confidence as something that holds women back more than their male colleagues. In fact, despite the initial focus on women, research now suggests that men are just as likely to experience impostorism. But maybe they are less likely to admit it?

How can you tackle Imposter Syndrome?

One of the most useful steps is to recognise that these fears are very normal & that many other people have them. Nobody knows everything and even the people at the top of your company or your profession probably have times when they too feel out of their depth. Don’t blindly believe your self-doubts or let them hold you back.

* Psychology research ref: Feeling like a Fraud, Christian Jarrett The Psychologist, May 2010

In September alone, we introduced a new initiative for returning professionals in partnership with Centrica, Mars and Vodafone, which are combining their efforts in the HitReturn returners programme: we also provided the coaching support at the start of the RBS Strategy ComeBack programme. At the same time, Deloitte, Allen & Overy and Cushman & Wakefield welcomed their first cohorts of returners and Morgan Stanley’s second programme commenced. In October, the first UK JP Morgan programme gets underway and we will have news of other upcoming programmes.

Simultaneously, our supported hiring innovation extends the range of options available to companies which wish to hire returners directly into open positions, while still providing support through the transition period. We are delighted that major employers, in particular M&G Investments, have signed up to this approach and we have more opportunities in the pipeline with smaller as well as larger employers. One employer we’ve already worked with told us that she was delighted to have accessed “a pool of top quality people” which she would otherwise have missed out on.

Despite all this encouragement, we recognise that there are still too far few openings for women returning to work after a career break and are focused on widening the range and variety of options available. We’d love to hear from you if you’ve been able to return to fulfilling work after your career break.

Posted by Katerina

• Draw up a list of all the possible people you could get in touch with, including people from your past, your present and those you’d like to meet in the future
• Starting with those who you find easiest to approach, set yourself a target of a number of calls to make, or emails to write, on a weekly basis.
• Ask friendly former colleagues if you can meet for a coffee to talk about industry or sector developments
• Join LinkedIn groups in your professional field and initiate, or comment on, discussions
• Volunteer at or attend relevant conferences or professional network meetings with the initial goal of speaking to just one or two people
• Reward yourself for meeting your targets, identify what went well with your approach so you can repeat it – and increase your targets as your confidence builds

• Performing well at interviews requires preparation
• Ask family, friends and even former colleagues to support you by giving you practice at answering interview-type questions. Ask them for feedback on both what you do well as well as ways to improve
• Take every opportunity for interviews as a place to practice your technique: even if you are not interested in the role, you can gain valuable experience from the interview itself

Posted by Katerina – co-founder of Women Returners